Finding my delight in the journey of adoption.

Well hello insecurity

Oh Beth Moore.  You win.  You got me.  I bought the book, laughed at the cover and thought to myself “good luck lady.”  Well done Beth.

Last night we had our last Bible study on the book by Beth Moore, So Long Insecurity. The simple message is that we are only insecure because we are placing our security in earthly things.  The only way we can truly be secure is to place our security in Christ.  Now those of us who are born-again Christians know that our eternal, spiritual security is already in Christ, but this is talking about our physical security.  The book is Biblically sound, and it really does challenge you and make you think.  Last night I would have said that this book has some great points and good a.

Today I would say that if you want God to knock you over and show you the depth of your brokenness, you should read this book.  This morning I went for my now normal jog with Bill.  About 15 minutes in, I could not stop my inner dialogue telling me that I was a pathetic loser for already being tired and wanting to stop.  I just couldn’t turn it off or make it positive.  Finally, I just had to stop, and I started bawling.  I sat down on the side of the path and just cried.  I needed to cry out to God to be my security despite the fact that I felt like I was worth of nothing because it’s still hard for me to run for 20 minutes.  I needed to see that it was OK to be slow and tired and out of shape and still be secure in Christ.

I don’t really have any grand lessons from this experience.  I will have the same inner dialogue tomorrow when I try again, but God can quiet it.

“Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness.  For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.”  Romans 8:26

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